Tag Archives: humour

The Dumbest/Most Embarrassing Things I Have Ever Done…

I have compiled a short, memorable list of some of the dumbest things I have ever done. I sincerely wish I could say these things were all done when I was a kid, but sadly I cannot. So, in no particular order, here they are:

1.) I was at my cousin’s wedding, wearing a gorgeous flowing BCBG dress that I felt great in. As I was walking to the reception area, my dress got caught in the door. For some reason, I decided to yank my dress in hopes of freeing it instead of simply opening the door like a normal person.

2.) Dying my hair dark black. I have naturally very light brown hair that verges on the ‘blonde’ side in the summer when the sun lightens it. Somehow, in seventh grade, I thought it would be a fun change to dye my hair black. Like, really, really black. Black hair accompanied by my fair skin made me look more like Morticia Addams that I wished.

3.) Once, when I was about five or six, my middle brother was eight, and my oldest brother was ten, we decided to help our neighbour (a girl who was four years old) retrieve the soccer ball she’d kicked into our neighbour’s backyard. So, my brothers and I climbed our fence and then the shed of our neighbour. The ball was in our sights, but just when we were getting ready to jump the shed, my middle brother fell through the roof. Yes, through the roof. You can imagine how much trouble we got into.

4.) When I was younger, my brothers loved–loved–to play pranks on me. We were eating at a japanese restaurant one time, and my brothers thought it would be a good idea to tell me that the wasabi was actually mint ice cream. I loved ice cream, so naturally I took a big spoonful and shovelled it into my mouth. I basically emptied all our water glasses while my brothers laughed their butts off.

5.) As mentioned above, my brother loved playing pranks on me when I was a child. One of these ‘pranks’ included re-directing me towards the ‘Sex Ed’ portion of our local Chapters. Can you imagine a seven year-old flipping the pages of this book? The worst part was I took it up to my mom when she arrived and started asking her questions about it.

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Typical Family Dinner Conversation + Reaction to Euro semi-final

Here is an excellent example of a typical conversation during dinner:

Me: Mother, these are some excellent mashed potatoes you have prepared.

Father: Indeed, these are exquisite.

Mother: Why, thank you both. May somebody please pass the peas?

Brother: Uhhhh…..durrr……I like toothpaste.

On another note…

I cannot even express how sad/frustrated I am at today’s result. I was really hoping Portugal would make it over Spain. I guess now I’ll be rooting for Germany full-on. I’ve always been a Germany supporter, so while Portugal not making the finals is heartbreaking sad for me, at least there’s a good chance Germany will make it to the finals.

And on another side note:

I’ve just realized a lot of my posts are categorized under “Quotes” when they really have nothing to do with the category. I will be fixing these shortly (meaning when I’m not too lazy to do it).

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Filed under Football, My Life, Soccer

A funny quote from the mother….

I distinctly remember one of my mother’s funniest, non-sensical, illogical quotes back from when I was twelve. I was at Wonderland with five of my closest friends and we’d just come off from The Fly. (Yes, I like that ride). The five of us had stumbled off feeling a little nauseous (we had just eaten before). And me, being my whiny self, complained about being dizzy. 

My mom then proceeded to say, “You know, Noelle, it’s not good for you to ride so many rollercoasters because when you do your brain disconnects from your skull and bounces around which causes you to lose brain cells and become dumber.” I swear, I am NOT making this quote up. 

My mom has since denied ever saying this despite me AND my friends insisting she did. Oh, well, I can understand why…

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Things I wish I were good at:

1.) Singing – I think it’s human nature to think you sound better than you actually are. Unfortunately, I found that out the hard way in first grade.

2.) Photography – I currently specialize in cutting people’s heads off, and blurry, indistinguishable figures.

3.) Public Speaking

4.)  Hockey – Everyone expects me to be. I come from a very pro-hockey family (God forbid I’m more interested in volleyball and soccer), and because when you’re Canadian, you have to be at least somewhat versed in the game of hockey.

5.) Making people laugh – Of course, though, I think I’m hilarious. The jury’s still out on this one.

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